Disclaimer: Well of course I don't own Gundam Wing or any of its delectable characters.
Note: Thanks so much for the reviews!
Heero
I can't leave it alone now, this one thought, the strange conclusion that I've finally come to: the one person I want more than anything is now lying here, dead to the world. What torments me though, is how long it took me to come to this point. Up until now, I've taken all the time I've had with him for granted, I've ignored him, shouted at him and whatnot. We've had arguments where I'd never bothered to apologise, but we got over it, because now I see that our friendship, however flimsy it may have seemed to others, had something more, something special.
Something I've come upon too late. I am, I suppose, what Duo would have called 'slow'. In fact, I'm sure that if he were able, he'd have been taking great enjoyment in telling me this. That is, if he felt the same way.
Would he?
Oh god, what a selfish thought. I'm sitting here watching someone who can no longer breathe by themselves and wondering do they feel the same? I'm a bastard. Always have been and always will be so it seems, I don't deserve him.
I am the 'Perfect Soldier', yes, I can do a lot of things that other people can't. But as I sit here watching the nurse pleading with Duo to try and open his eyes or move an index finger, I feel more useless than I've been.
Wufei hesitantly entered the room, the sight instantly renewing his hatred of the blank cream walls and the uniform curtains draped across the window. No matter what hospital in the world you enter, they all manage to look the same.
There was always a nurse present now, their job being to continuously monitor and maintain various different tests or 'observations' as the liked to call them on the patient. Apparently, this was the norm for any patients with serious head injuries. All they were looking for so far was a reaction that would show that there was indeed activity going on in the brain.
Heero looked up and gave him an uncharacteristically tired smile, 'Wufei.'
Wufei nodded to him in return, 'Any change?'
Heero shook his head slowly, 'Nothing. He's not doing anything.' he shifted a little in his chair, 'He's coming in and out of unconciousness to a point but that's just normal.'
'Heero you look tired, I'll take over and sit with him for a while, Quatre's got a room booked for you in the hotel just across the road.'
'No.' Heero turned his gaze back to the bed, 'I think I'll stay if that's alright.'
Wufei hesitated, 'Yuy, it's been 48 hours since you-'
'No, Wufei.' anger flashed briefly across the handsome, strained face before Heero managed to compose himself, 'Thanks for the offer though. Appreciate it.'
'Excuse me,' the nurse smiled apologetically at the two pilots, 'But I can only have one of you in here at any given time.'
Wufei nodded, conceding defeat, 'Fine then, but don't hesitate to ring if you need a break.' He left without waiting for a reply which Heero, being stubborn, wasn't about to give.
'Duo, can you move your fingers for me?'
Nothing. The nurse's voice was clear and loud when she asked the second time, and the third. Heero watched attentively as she sighed and wrote down the details.
'What happens if this keeps up?'
'Well,' She scratched her head and tried to smile, 'It's still early yet, but if he continues to show no reaction then he'll be declared brain dead and we'll have to turn off the life support. But as I said, it's early... but he still should have shown something by now.'
That statement hung dead in the air. Heero stared at her mutely, but his expression as usual, retained its deadpan nature; but inside he was reeling. Understandably, the nurse felt a little uncomfortable under the pilot's disconcerting gaze, 'I'm sorry, we'll do all we can to prevent that of course... Look, can I get you a drink or anything Mr. Yuy?'
Heero paused for a moment, then blinked, 'Yes, actually, if you don't mind, a glass of water?'
'Of course,' she beamed, relieved to have escaped the awkward moment, 'I'll be back in just a minute. If anything happens though, the station nurse is just outside okay?'
'No problem.'
The minute she left, Heero was on his feet. What she said was a long way past unsettling, Heero moved round the bed, silently willing the Deathscythe pilot to move with something close to desperation. He put a hand out towards him and then drew it back uncertainly. It was frustrating. His fists clenched and unclenched, Duo was now involved in a race against time, or so it seemed, and it Heero felt he was beginning to lose it.
On impulse, he bent over and brushed the chestnut hair out of the way of Duo's ear, his knuckles began to turn white as he gripped the sidebar of the bed.
'Duo, I need you to come out of wherever it is that you are. If you don't you're going to...' Heero trailed off, 'Look, just move something, that's all you've got to do. One damn finger, a big toe, whatever... Please Duo, f-' he was about to say 'for me'. Instead, he put a hand out and smoothed down the unruly chestnut bangs and tried to think of something to say to fill the awkward gap he'd just created for himself. 'Okay, if it makes you feel any better,' Duo would appreciate his bad sense of humour, give him something he'd want to hear, something more light-hearted than his previous message of imminent death, 'I'm sorry for the other day when I said that Top gear was a stupid show. Now. You'll never hear me say that again so make it worth it right?' He straightened up and looked on the unresponsive, deathly pale face and felt his eyes sting.
The Perfect Soldier sat back down with his head in his hands and a barely audible sigh of frustration. Wufei was right, he was too tired.
As if on cue, the nurse reappeared with the promised glass of water, 'Sorry, there was a little delay.' she spoke somewhat breathlessly, 'But I've just spoke to Doctor Bashir and he's suggested I try something new.' She made her way over to the bed, 'He said that maybe I should introduce a stronger stimulus.'
'What do you mean?'
'Well he's not reacting to sound, and that could be for any amount of reasons,' she waved her hand to emphasise the point, 'So now I'm going to try and appeal more to the sense of touch.'
'But you always touch his hands when you speak to him.'
'That might be too weak for him to detect in a semi-comatose state apparently so now I'm going to cause him a little pain.'
'What?' Heero instinctively became alarmed, 'How can that possibly help?! I think he's already feeling enough of it as it is.'
'It's nothing big,' she smiled in hope of reassuring and raised her voice, 'Duo, I'm going to have to cause you pain if you don't respond.' she looked at Heero again, 'It's not a punishment of any kind, it's really the only way you can motivate patients like this to respond; you don't know what mental state they may be in, some are known to be quite happy to say in this comatose state and simply don't listen, that's what your friend may be doing. It's hard to picture, I know, but when the brain is injured in this way, one experiences a whole different stream of conciousness that's both confusing and alien, so why not try and hide away in the darknes and leave it alone?'
Heero frowned, 'I suppose.'
'Duo, I'm going to have to cause you pain if you don't respond.'
He didn't respond so she pinched the back of his right hand. The response was instantaneous; his left hand lifted off the bed and then fell down again with a thump and his eyes fluttered open briefly before closing again.
Heero froze, after willing it for so long and then to see it actually happen, it stunned him.
'It's not great, but it's a very welcome start I think,' the nurse was beaming, 'It shows that the brain is alive and sending out messages, it may have got messed up along the way, but it shows that there is indeed activity going on.'
Heero was elated, he excused himself to go and ring the others and tell them the good news.
Note: Am I right in thinking I must inject some humour into this story in the near future? I'm going to have to speed up too, things feel a little dreary and 'slow'. And thanks for the reviews, you guys rock! Hopefully now chapter 3 will have more action and less coma-ness, it's too bloody hard to write that and make it interesting.