Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.
A/N: Whoa! I took a while to update didn't I? Although I had good reasons to take this long I won't bore you with them :). A small warning though, I have struggled with these two chapters immensely, I have written them, then rewritten them, then re-rewritten them... and I'm still not happy with them. This is my best attempt so far and I hope it delivers. I just couldn't get the emotions of the story onto the page.
Sorry if there are errors in grammar and stuff, my biggest weakness is sentence fragments and I can never spot them so I can never fix them. Sorry! Also, if you find me lapsing into netspeak during the story, forgive me. I've conditioned myself to accept netspeak and because of that it escapes my attention even after proofreading.
Now onto my dreadful end to the story,
Posted on 16th Oct. 2007
The next morning felt like a dream. I was very aware of Duo’s proximity to me and the slight tickle of his hair on my bare skin. I could smell him all around me and his presence filled me completely. I breathed in deeply and stretched feeling his hair slip off my stomach with the movement.
Blinking slowly, I looked to my side to see him lying on his stomach, breathing slowly. It’s moments like these that make me feel incredibly lucky… looking at everything we’ve been through and then still ending up together feels very… surreal.
I rolled over and scooted towards him, mindful of pulling his hair and brushed his bangs off his face.
“Duo?” I asked softly and he frowned in his sleep. I rethought my idea of waking him up and let him sleep a little longer. Not to mention he looked breathtaking in his sleep.
God I’ve fallen badly for him haven’t I?
I got out of bed smoothly so as to not jostle Duo and left the room, flushing when I spied the clothes tossed all over the room. Making a mental note to pick them up later I headed to the washroom.
Duo came bouncing into the kitchen as I pulled out two granola bars for us. The power had not returned yet and because of that the milk had gone bad. It was old anyway. The loss of power also prevented me from making any kind of breakfast on the electric stove.
Its pathetic how dependent we are on electricity.
“Why are you dressed?” Was his first question as he noticed me in my uniform. I raised an eyebrow at his choice of clothing. He had chosen to wear sweatpants and a lose tank. “It’s Saturday.” He said as answer to my expression.
“The storm last night caused us to lose communication with HQ. We need to go to the office to see if we’re needed.” I said as I tossed him a breakfast bar.
“But it’s Saturday!” He whined. I gave him a look and he grumbled and then left to get changed.
I smiled conspiratorially. I liked – no, loved – getting my way.
“Can you believe good ol’ Preventeer Agents reduced to this…?” Duo complained for the hundredth time as he moved his right arm to let the traffic through.
“This is a job, Duo. So pay attention!” I said quickly to him as he snapped his hand back down and barely managed to avoid two cars slamming into each other. The rain last night had frozen over making the roads an exceptionally dangerous place to be… making our job just a little bit harder and Duo’s temper a little bit worse (1).
“I know! I know! Did I tell you to move?” He yelled at a lady who glared back at him. “And you…” He snarled at the other driver.
I rolled my eyes and continued directing the traffic. All the stop lights had stopped working and every intersection had to be manually directed. There weren’t just enough police officers for the job so now Preventeers had to take over some of the intersections.
Needless to say Duo despised this and his constant complaining was getting on my nerves. It was a long day and just directing traffic was a monotonous and often aggravating job.
Duo and I were assigned to the same intersection, a much larger than normal one so we could direct two sides of the intersection. This required a lot of interaction between us which led to him complaining for the past four hours.
I sighed. This is going to be a long day. By the time we were given a break for lunch Duo was furious beyond belief and I was just tired of his rants.
“This was not in the job description!” Duo complained again and I snapped.
“Fine! I get it! But we all have to pitch in so just stop complaining!” I said to him and his face twisted in anger. It’s not just him who has to step down from his pedestal and direct traffic! The entire Preventeers is pretty much stepping out of that building to help out! What makes him so special that he can’t do the same?
“You have to admit this is degrading!”
“It’s a job and it is not degrading! Pretty much every Preventeer agent is out right now doing them. Not to mention this is a part of our job as well! We also work as backup for the police, and this is backing up!”
“No! Those people are just idiots! They couldn’t find their own ass with a map!” I rolled my eyes at his response and I could see he was not getting any calmer. I decided to try and finish this argument as best as I could in my agitated state.
“It’s for one day! Just deal with it!” I hissed at him.
“Today is a Saturday! And you just had to drag me here and work on a holiday didn’t you?” So this is about missing a holiday? How juvenile can he get?
“I never dragged you here! If you didn’t want to come you could have just stayed in bed!”
“And you would leave anyway! And then you’d belittle me about taking my rightful day off!” Wait… what?
“I never belittle you!” I countered disbelievingly. Tell me when I have belittled this guy?
“Of course you do! You’re fucking perfect at everything! You have to have everything done well! And then every time I screw up you throw it in my face!” He yelled at me and I gaped at him.
Taking deep breaths I tried to reign in my anger at the accusations. “I don’t throw anything in your face.” I said as calmly as I could but I was grinding my teeth to keep myself from insulting him.
“Oh yes you do. You have since the very first day we met. You have to be perfect. Heero Perfect Soldier Yuy, that’s you. Compared to you the rest of us are nothing, I’m nothing!” He hissed not taking a cue from my restraint and calming down.
I swallowed several times trying to keep my calm but it was quickly becoming impossible.
“See, even now… I can see you think I’m below you for giving into my anger and not calming down, like you… You think I am immature to want my day off when you left to work without thought.” He said seeming calmer but his words made my blood boil partly because I had thought that even if it wasn’t along the same lines.
“I see. I’m going home.” I said to him tightly and turned to leave.
“Why? Not going to finish your job soldier?” He mocked me and my hands curled into fists with the urge to punch him. Without looking back I walked away in the direction of our apartment.
“Yuy? Be back in fif…” The replacement agent started calling and I whipped around to snap at him.
“Find someone else!” I yelled at him and marched down the sidewalk.
“What’s wrong with him?” I heard him ask his partner.
“Don’t know. Something important must have come up. He never leaves work.” Came the quick answer and for some reason it made me angrier.
Trembling with frustration I made a beeline for home.
My hands trembled as I pushed the key into the door. The door swung open and I headed inside blinded with anger. Without looking I went straight to the couch and collapsed into it holding my head in my hands.
God Duo could be so infuriating!
I mumbled random things to myself trying to calm down when I felt Duo’s hands running through my hair. So he was back to apologize huh? I refused to look up though.
“Shh… It’ll be okay Hee-chan.” My head snapped up at that voice just as a wet cloth was pressed against my nose and mouth.
No! It can’t be… but he was…
“Don’t try to fight the drug Hee-chan… even I’m not resistant to it.” Derosia said in a voice that dripped with disgusting sweetness. I struggled as hard as I could, trying to get my face away from the cloth. I clawed at his hand and then gripped the cloth in an effort to push it away from me but Derosia used his hand that was tangled in my hair to hold me steady. “Don’t worry, it won’t make you lose consciousness. It’ll just paralyze you for a little while, we don’t want you struggling while we go on our romantic trip now do we?”
I felt my arms and legs going numb and I started to fall forward as my control over my body was snatched from me. He broke my fall and laid me gently on the carpet so that I could see him rushing back and forth looking at this and that. I tried to move my fingers but I couldn’t feel them. I felt panic building but even then I could do nothing more than let out a pathetic whimper. He’d been waiting for me at my home. He’d gotten in and had waited for me. I hadn’t even seen him! Had he been hiding? Had he been in plain view? How could I be so stupid! The power outage must have allowed him to bust through!
He knelt next to me and patted me down, removing the gun, the handcuffs as well as the com unit I carry with my uniform. “We can’t have you running around with dangerous weapons right? You might hurt yourself.” He said sweetly and took all my stuff and went into the bedroom probably to dispose of them. “Getting a little messy now Hee-chan?” He called from the bedroom and I remembered the piles of clothes I hadn’t picked up this morning. My face flushed when I realized that he would be able to guess what had happened. “Or maybe just a little bit impatient?” He said mockingly. He came out and knelt beside me, his eyes tracing every part of my body but lingering longer at my crotch. “Did he touch you Hee-chan? While I was busting my ass trying to get out of the jail cell and then avoiding and attacking soldiers so that I could come see you, he was touching you there wasn’t he?” He said as he placed his hand on my crotch and squeezed. “Tell me Hee-chan… did you enjoy it? Did he put his big manly dick in your tight little hole?” He pouted and I felt his hand massaging my crotch. Quickly, he had my fly unzipped and his hand was on my skin. “Did he touch you like this?”
I glared at him the best I could in my position and he laughed at me. But at least it got his hand out of my pants. He got up, leaving my fly undone and then started walking around looking at this and that seemingly forgotten about me. From my vantage point I saw Derosia humming a random tune as he perused through my collection of novels… what was he doing? Is this an abduction or not?
“Calm down Hee-chan. I’m just waiting for the little traitor. You didn’t think I’ll let Maxwell get away with touching you, did you? You’re mine, and he touched what’s mine. He’s got to be punished or he’ll never learn.” He said distractedly as he pulled out a novel and frowned at it. At his words I felt the blood draining from my face. I could handle being tortured but if he hurt Duo…
Oh God Duo… please, please don’t come home now… I don’t want him to hurt Duo… Please Duo don’t come home.
“What luck that you’d come home by yourself! I was prepared for a lot of shouting and cursing. That Maxwell is very… uncivilized is he not? How come he let you come home alone? Angry at him?” He shot me a smug look. “I bet he did something stupid. I don’t know why you would want him… I’m a much better choice.” He said as he picked up a picture of Duo and I and frowned at it. “You know what? I’ll kill him for you. That way you don’t have to be angry at him anymore and I don’t have to compete with him… everyone’s happy.”
I tried to talk, to do anything to convince him that was a bad idea but all that came out was a moan. When I tried to move my arm all I got was a small twitch. My face felt frozen and my mouth was open. I cringed inwardly as a small trail of saliva escaped my mouth and dribbled down my cheek. Derosia looked at me and clicked his tongue. He grabbed a tissue and knelt next to me wiping my face.
“Oh poor Hee-chan. I’ll take care of you. I told you I won’t ever leave you.” He said to me as he gripped my chin looking intensely at me. “I had forgotten how beautiful you were…” He whispered as he leaned down and placed his mouth on mine, pushing his tongue in and getting no resistance from me. He took his time tasting me while I felt sick to my stomach. “By the way, very interesting alarm system you have here… What luck that the power disabled it! I would have tripped it long before I even knew it was there!” He said after he was done, his thumb lightly rubbing my lips.
We heard the doorknob jiggle and I felt cold, chilling panic wash over me. Duo was here! No!
Derosia let go of my mouth immediately and straightened up. As we heard the jiggle of keys going into the lock I saw Derosia walk leisurely to a steel vase and picked it up. He then walked calmly and placed himself next to the door so that when the door opened he’d be hidden from view. I tried as hard as I could to push air into my lungs and then force a scream out but I couldn’t and all I got was a stupid moan. I nearly cried with frustration then.
The door opened and Duo poked his head in.
“Hee-chan?” He asked timidly before taking a step in. He hadn’t seen me but I could see him. I could also see Derosia step out from behind the door and hold the vase up threateningly behind Duo’s head.
I moaned again trying to get Duo to move toward me so that Derosia would miss. He did see me, but I was too late. I saw his eyes widen in horror and worry as he saw me lying on the ground, unmoving when the steel connected hard with Duo’s skull and his eyes went blank. I saw it all happen in slow motion as his eyes rolled back and a trickle of blood appeared around his hairline and then dripped down the side of his face. I saw his knees buckle and he landed on the ground with a dull thud. I saw him move his arms and try to get up but Derosia stepped on his back refusing to let him move. Duo let out a wheezing breath as he pushed down harder on him.
I think I cried then, but I couldn’t be sure. I prayed to whatever god there may be that Duo was okay, that he would be fine…
Derosia squashed that hope by bringing that vase down a second time and Duo abruptly stopped moving. I let out a strangled keening cry as I watched Derosia bring down the vase again and again down on Duo’s head until I was sure he couldn’t possible still be alive. I knew I was crying now when my vision blurred with tears. I could feel a big lump stuck in my throat preventing me from breathing and my heart felt like it was crushing into itself, leaving a hole in my chest.
My arms twitched again, stronger this time. All the times I had spent with Duo over the years flashed in front of my eyes. The first time I saw him on the loading dock, when I used to play basketball with him, the way the world didn’t seem so bad when I saw him after a battle, us living together, falling in love, making love…I willed myself to fight the drug, to do anything, anything. I forced my body to move. My arm twitched again and again, stronger every time until I felt I could almost move a finger. If I could just get up, maybe… just maybe Duo was still alive, maybe I could still save him… maybe…
I heard the steel vase land on the floor and then roll towards me. It was stained with thick blood and dented heavily. There was no way… no way anyone could survive that…
I forced myself to move my tongue. I managed to push it just enough that it landed on my lower teeth. Then I struggled to close my jaws hoping to kill myself but I couldn’t close them. The movement was too slow for me to bite my tongue.
“Uh-uh… no committing suicide! Don’t you know that’s wrong? We should talk, maybe that would help.” Derosia said as he ripped the Duo’s sleeve off, struggling when the cuff snagged on Duo’s watch, and stuffed it in my mouth to keep myself from killing myself. The sleeve was soaked in Duo’s blood and I could taste it in my mouth. I could smell his blood and… “Oh Hee-chan… you’ll be all better soon.” He said distractedly as he dragged Duo’s body beside me. Duo’s face was turned to me and it was so bloody… his eyes were closed, his bangs plastered to his forehead with blood, his normally vibrant hair were lifeless and dull as they snaked around his body.
Please be alive, please be alive, please be alive… I saw Duo’s hand near his head and I wanted to hold it one last time so badly it hurt. If I could just move my hand, just touch Duo’s… just feel his warmth one more time before I could never touch him again… I somehow managed to move my hand enough that it was an inch away from Duo’s, so close… almost there…
“There… Thank you for being so patient, love. We can leave now.” He said as he lifted me up by my armpits and threw me over his shoulder as I watched the distance between me and Duo increase. “Let’s go.” I was not able to touch him that last time… and I think that being unable to say goodbye crushed me.
He might be okay… I might see him again… I didn’t check his pulse and neither did Derosia… he could be okay… he’ll be fine… someone will find him soon I’m sure… he’ll be fine… we’ll meet again…
Down in the parking garage he stuffed me on the floor of the backseat of Duo’s car. I hadn’t even noticed him grab Duo’s keys… It surprised and scared me how well he had planned all this. He threw a blanket over my body to cover me up and got into the driver’s seat.
“See the chaos outside today Hee-chan?” He asked me as he started up the engine. “You know what that means? No one will be checking the backseat to see who’s under the blanket.” He said and I could hear the smile in his voice. I bit down hard on Duo’s sleeve and tasted Duo’s blood on it. I’ll miss Duo so much… I don’t even know how… will I be able to… Duo…
I spent the next several hours thinking of all the times Duo and I had spent together… all the times I had yelled at him and he had apologized, all the times he had told me he loved me… I love him so much… how could Derosia take away the one person I couldn’t live without? How could he… the way he hit Duo… he had no mercy, no hesitation at all at taking another life…
Sometime while he was driving I started getting feeling back into my arms and legs but I still felt too weak to move them, every attempt to move them lead to a twitch but at least I could feel the scratch of the rough carpet against my hands and the feel of the blanket covering my face. I opened my eyes, not remembering when I had closed them. The sun was shining through the sheer curtains on my face causing me to wake up. I threw an arm over my eyes to block the sunlight when I suddenly shot up in bed.
I can move… I looked down on my hands and moved each finger. I could move! I looked around quickly checking to see if Derosia was here. I saw the clothes strewn about the room, the door slightly open as though someone had nudged it close but hadn’t bothered to completely close it. The black dresser, the large mirror… the blue covers…
I was in our bedroom… it was all a nightmare? Feeling exhausted I rubbed my face… it all felt so real… I almost lost Duo…
DUO!! I jerked to look at my side and saw him asleep on his stomach, his mouth hanging open breathing softly. I let out a sigh of relief.
He’s safe. He’s okay. I placed a palm on his back between his shoulder blades feeling his warmth seep into my hand. I was so scared that he had left… he’s still here… I pushed some of the stray hairs near his face away as I bent to place a soft kiss on his cheek reveling in his scent. But when my lips connected to his cheek I felt something warm and sticky. I opened my eyes to see Duo staring at me, his eyes wide and blank and a trail of blood dripping down the side of his face. He wheezed loudly and then just seemed to deflate.
“Duo?” I asked unbelieving when I saw Derosia standing on the other side of the bed holding a vase up.
“You’re so beautiful Hee-chan. We’ll be together forever now.” He said as he opened his mouth and let out a loud manic laugh. I tried to get off the bed and run but I couldn’t move. I was frozen in one place and Derosia kept laughing… Duo kept bleeding and his blood soaked into the bed sheets turning the whole bed red. I opened my mouth and screamed.
My eyes opened suddenly and the scream from my dream turned into a grunt.
It was a dream? Duo’s dead… even in my dreams he’s dead… the wave of depression that thought followed alone could have killed me. Only the cloth that tasted of Duo kept me from killing myself. Ironic isn’t it? Even in death, the only thing keeping me alive is Duo.
“At least Maxwell did something right. We have enough gas to get to our getaway without making a stop. What’s the mileage on this thing?” He asked me. He didn’t seem to expect an answer as I heard some shuffling. “What’s this?” I heard him say and then I heard the definite click of the glove compartment closing. “Interesting…” He didn’t say anything after that but I wondered what he had found in there.
With a start I remembered the watch I was wearing, the one that Duo had made for me... My thoughts suddenly zoomed in on the little button on the side that would alert everybody to my location… if only I could just move my finger… move my arm a little to the left and press that button… just a little movement…
But I just twitched and I felt a fresh wave of tears flow down my cheeks when I realized that I couldn’t reach it. I spent the rest of the ride trying to reach the button but never quite making it.
The ride got bumpy for a little while which told me we were now off-road and then suddenly the car stopped. The door opened and I was hauled out of the car by my feet, the blanket still on me. My head hit the ground hard and I saw stars but I didn’t care anymore. All I wanted was to reach the button somehow and I could have Derosia punished – no, killed – for ever thinking of harming my Duo.
He dragged me a little bit and then he pulled me up again and threw me over his shoulder, blanket and all.
“Curious Hee-chan? You didn’t remember me from your little past… let’s see if you remember this place.” He said as he placed me down on a chair and pulled the blanket off my face. If I could have gasped I would have. This is where Dr. J trained me. My last hope of contacting my friends was squashed as well. This place was underground. No signals could be traced from here. Dr. J did that so that our activities and the signals that the Gundams sent out could not be traced once they entered this place.
“Remember?” He said as he removed Duo's sleeve from my mouth and kissed me languidly. “We’ll live here… forever…”
With a rush I remembered everything. All the memories I had pushed down of Derosia, I remembered him again. All the crying, the pain and terror he had put me through. I remembered him locking me in a freezer with the rest of the rations and refused to let me out unless I bent the metal lock out of place. I remember him grabbing me every night and raping me to ‘make me stronger’. I remember him breaking my fingers one by one because I had tripped and broken a beaker.
Now I know why I was so scared of him… he was my boogeyman, my monster under the bed… everything I was terrified of at that young age. And without even realizing it consciously I had been terrified of him still.
Have you ever felt like you were in a dream… that this possibly couldn’t be happening… I felt like that. And I hoped so much that I would just wake up…
He laid me down on a bed in a room that he referred to as the bedroom. It wasn’t as much a bedroom as it was a room with beds. It was sterile and white. The beds were single beds with steel frames and military style white sheets on thin mattresses.
“Everything will be fine now Hee-chan. Remember? This is where I first met you… I fell in love with you right then… and I vowed that you’d be mine. See? Aren’t I determined?” He asked me but my mind was blank. I had one goal at the moment and it was to kill Derosia and then kill myself. “The drug will wear off soon, then I can make love to you.” He said as he kissed me again. “Oh I can’t wait.” He placed his hand between my legs and squeezed but the drug prevented any reaction I might have had to him. He moaned softly, his eyes glazing over as he kept massaging me.
He seemed to suddenly come back to himself when I didn’t respond at all. He frowned slightly, looked at his wrist watch, hummed and then turned back to look at me. “Won’t be long now.” He said distractedly, got up and left.
As soon as he disappeared, the lump in my throat came back and images of Duo’s face, his blank eyes and his blood soaked hair flashed before my eyes. I squeezed my eyes shut repeating mentally to myself that I’ll do everything in my power to kill Derosia and then commit suicide. At least then I could be near Duo.
1) Inspired by rush hour 3! Funniest movie this year (IMO)
A/N: Here's my list of everyone who got Duo's question right: lyn, michikaru-san, InsanitysCandy (Close so I count you as a winner), Koneko-chan, Ryuske, angelsmystique, xBornxOfxFlamesx, LilShinni13, one-hep-cat (where's the next chap to Replaced? grin), Toola (did you read my mind? You were very certain!), Kirux (there may be a puppy in the near future grin), jesseklom (I hope I had no netspeak in this one!), snowdragonct (Thanks for being patient! I know I was immensely slow this time)
Wow, lots of people got it right! Now here's your reward: Double update! No cliffie today!
Let's hope the end is half decent... sorry if it sucks! I tried, really really tried to make it good!