notes & disclaimers: first warning is this is depressing mostly cuz i was really down when i wrote it and this is sorta my therapy. don't read it if you don't like suicides. oh yeah, and i don't own hee-chan cuz if i did i wouldn't be wasting my time doing this.
//he stood alone at the edge of a large lake. as he watched, the waters turned red with blood and began to pool around his feet. countless dead souls rose from the dark redness, swarming towards him. he tried to back away but slipped in the deepening blood. more spirits joined the first, calling for him and moaning. he turned to run; trying to escape, but the blood and spirits kept coming. no matter how fast he ran, they kept coming and coming. . . . .//
heero jerked awake with a loud yelp. he shoved sweat drenched hair from his face and stared around his small apartment. still shaking, he stumbled to the bathroom and splashed cold water on his face.
climbing back into his bed, heero pulled his knees up to his chest and rocked back and forth slowly. “when will they stop?” he whispered to himself. “when will they just go away?”
for the past few weeks, heero’s sleep had been plagued by nightmares of the war; of all the blood and deaths he’d caused. when the war had ended, heero’s perfect soldier cover had begun to break. and hidden within was a small boy --- a boy who was lonely, scared and tired. he was tired of war, tired of deaths, tired of blood and tired of his life. he wanted his freedom.
he had lost track of the other gundam pilots. he had no other family or friends. and without the war, he had no purpose. once again, he was lost and alone.
reaching into the bedtable’s drawer, heero pulled out a small gun and stared at it intently.
the thought of using it had crossed his mind so many times. all he needed to do was pull the trigger, and everything would end. if he didn’t. . . .
“well what’s left to live for?” he asked angrily. “no relatives, no friends, no home, no great cause, no life, no hope. . . . ” a single tear slid down heero’s cheek and landed on the gun.
“i was trained as a soldier; as a weapon. and when the war ends, the weapons are tossed aside and forgotten. the weapons cease to be.”
gathering himself together, heero sat up straight and raised the gun to his temple. he closed his eyes and quickly pulled the trigger. a loud *bang!* erupted from the gun, and heero’s lifeless body fell back on the bed.
heero yuy was finally free.
~owari~