Rating: Pg-13
Feedback: Hey, this is one of my fics that I actually like. I think its pretty good. Please let me know what you think. Send comments at Lady_Q.Barton[ AT ]gundamwing.org. I will reply back to everyone who sends comments. Enjoy minna-san!!!
Disclaimers: I don't own gundam wing so please don't sue. Besides I really don't have any money. It would be pointless.
Quatre sat in class staring at the beautiful boy in front of him. Daydreaming.
"Quatre.......Quatre. Are you paying attention?" The teacher asked. He got out of his trance and blushed. Does she know I was starring?
"Yes?" He asked.
"Well, what's the answer." She asked giving him a scolding look. Quatre blushed heavily and put his head down in shame and whispered. "Gomen sensei, I wasn't paying attention." She sighed and gave him a disappointed look.
"I expected more from you, Quatre." He slowly looked up at her. "I know, I'm sorry." The bell rang, and it was time to go home. Before Quatre could leave she called him back. "What's going on with you Quatre, You're usually so attentive."
"I'm sorry, I have a lot on my mind." She smiled." Well...I hope everything comes together for you.... I'll see you tomorrow." He left finding Duo waiting for him at his locker. Duo put an arm around Quatre and they began to walk home. Duo chuckled, "I can't believe that you, Quatre Rebera Winner, were day dreaming in class." Quatre had to laugh, after all he was right it was pretty unbelievable. "I don't know what came over me." Duo looked at Quatre for a minute. "Oh, I know what came over you ...You were bored out of your mind." Duo held his head up high. "Yep, it happens to the best of us." They continued to walk the rest of the way in silence. Quatre couldn't stop thinking about the boy he cared for so much. Why can't I just tell him how I feel. They were always the first ones to arrive at the house after school. Wufie was usually the last. Duo walked straight into the kitchen, like he did everyday after school. He opened the fridge door and began to look for something to eat. Quatre walked in and giggled at the sight of Duo's ass hanging out of the frig door. Duo looked up and closed the frig door, with a chicken leg sticking out of his mouth. "What" he asked with his mouth full.
"I was just wondering if we were gonna do something tonight, it being Friday and all." Duo took a bite of his chicken and swallowed this time before answering.
"Yeah, we're all gonna go see that movie, Tantalizing Death, tonight...Hopefully everyone will join me for drinks afterwards. hmm, a scary movie, maybe I can use that to my advantage. Quatre thought.
"So, where's Heero?" Quatre asked.
"I believe I can answer that." Trowa said walking into the room. Quatre jumped slightly at the sound of his voice. Trowa noticed," Gomen, did I scare you?" Quatre turned a light shade of pink. "Oh, Trowa...uh, no I was just a little surprised."
"So, where is Heero anyway, I think that little baka's avoiding me. I haven't seen him all day?" Duo asked. I wonder what I did this time? Trowa walked over to Duo and hugged him. Duo froze, and Quatre couldn't believe what he was seeing. Trowa let go of him after a half a second. "Heero told me to give that to you...I owed him a favor. Anyway Relena's been hounding him all day, he's still trying to ditch her." Duo immediately loosened.
"Man, I hate that bitch. Why can't she just leave us alone?" Duo said feeling himself become angry and he threw his chicken bone in the trash.
"She better not ruin this night for me." He finished. Trowa shrugged and walked out of the kitchen. Quatre sat down at the table and Duo joined him.
Duo smiled. "I bet you thought Tro-chan was coming on to me, didn't you?" Quatre replayed the image in his mind. "Yeah, for a second there."
"I'm telling you Q, you should just tell him, it's been a year. I think you've waited long enough." Quatre sighed heavily," I know, but what if he doesn't feel the same way." Duo gave him a sympathetic smile." I'm sorry buddy, it's a chance you're gonna have to take... I took that chance with Heero, and I couldn't be any happier." Quatre shut his eyes tight." What if I lose him, I couldn't bare that."
"Come on, Quatre, Trowa's you're friend, he wouldn't do that." Quatre tried to smile. "I hope you're right."
Later on that night...
Five Gundam pilots walked out of the theater and headed towards the bar for some drinks. Quatre's attempts to get close to Trowa had failed, in the event that Trowa was passed out throughout the whole movie. He hadn't gotten much sleep in the last 48 hours, due to a paper he was writing for class. But something else had been bothering him that night, but Quatre was afraid to ask. Duo and Heero were joined at the hip as always. Duo was yacking on and on about how great he thought the movie was. Heero quietly listened to him. Wufie walked with Quatre. And Trowa chose to lag behind.
"So, tell me again how we are gonna get into this bar? We are all under age." Wufie asked Duo.
"Don't worry about it. I know the owner. He lets us in here all the time.........." Duo answered. Wufie looked over at Quatre and Quatre nodded his head in agreement.
"I can't believe I'm going a long with such none sense." Wufie muttered.
"Do worry Wu-chan, you'll have fun......" Quatre promised.
Just before they entered the bar, Quatre stayed back and waited for Trowa. He looked at Quatre annoyed, and Quatre noticed.
"Um...I was just...uh...I was just wondering if you were ok." Trowa forced a smile. "Yes, of course ...why do you ask?"
"Well, you seemed fine this afternoon, but you've been so distant this evening."
"I'm fine," Trowa tried to assure him. "Come on let's go inside."
An hour later....
Duo and Heero were in a corner making out. Trowa and Wufie were at a table laughing about something. Quatre sat at the bar. What in the world could make them laugh? He was trying to get the girl next to him to stop talking to him. He took a few more drinks of the drink he had, and excused himself from the lady. Well, I guess now would be as good as any other time. He walked over to the table Trowa was sitting at and asked him if he could speak with him in private. Trowa excused himself, and Quatre led him to the bathroom.
"So, have you had much to drink?" Quatre asked him.
"No, not really, maybe two or three beers....but I'm sure that's not why you asked me in here." Quatre blushed. "No, its not, but you seem to be in a much better mood." Trowa shrugged. "Not really." Quatre shifted nervously. "Trowa, there's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?" Trowa said smiling. Quatre took a deep breath. "Well..I uh..I love you Trowa..I mean...in..love with you." If Trowa had had any kind of expression on his face it was gone. Quatre patiently waited for his response. They stood there staring in each other's eyes. Quatre's full of hope, Trowa's unreadable. Finally Trowa spoke.
"You don't know what you're talking about Quatre. You think you love me just so you can have someone to love." Pain shot all over Quatre's body, he was already on the verge of tears.
"No, Trowa I do love-" Trowa interrupted him. "No, Quatre I'm sorry. It just wouldn't work. I'm not the kind of person you want to be with...let it go." With that he walked out, leaving Quatre standing there alone. He didn't wan to cry, but he couldn't help himself. He went into a corner and curled up and cried. Thirty minutes later, Quatre walked back to where he was sitting at the bar and he just drank. He drank until he almost passed out. Wufie noticed that Quatre was having way too much to drink. He went over and paid the bartender. Grabbed Quatre against his drunken will and carried him home.
The weekend past and Quatre didn't come out of his room once. Duo tried to go up and find out what was wrong, but Quatre turned him away at the door every time. Trowa was also no where to be found. He never showed up at the house that night. So, Duo had a pretty good idea of what was going on.
Monday morning...
Quatre decided that Trowa was right. He needed to let it go. He got up and went to school and tried to pretend it was just any another day, but it wasn't. Duo finally got up with Quatre at lunch. They didn't have any classes together, except history, which was the only class they all had together. He wasn't gonna wait that long to talk to him. He found Quatre sitting alone at a tree.
"Is it ok if I sit her" Duo asked holding some food in his hand. Quatre looked up at him and sighed. "If you must." Duo sat down and looked at his friend with concern. "What happened?" Quatre had been trying so hard not to think about it all day. "I really don't wanna talk about it, Duo." Duo's voice became soft and gentle.
"Please, Quatre, your like my brother, I wanna help." Quatre rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, like you helped me before." He said coldly.
"What do you mean?" Duo whispered, hurt by the way his friend was speaking to him. Quatre looked at him and knew how much he was hurting Duo. He sighed heavily and began to sob.
"I'm sorry Duo, I shouldn't be taking this out on you....but you said I wouldn't lose him and I did." Duo wrapped his arms around him to comfort him.
"What do you mean you lost him." Quatre rested his head on Duo's shoulder and explained exactly what happen, not leaving out the smallest detail. When he was done Duo held him in a hug while Quatre cried. Heero walked up to them at that moment and saw Duo holding Quatre. He cleared his throat, "am I interrupting something?" he said with anger in his voice. Quatre looked up at him, and Heero saw that he was crying. Quatre sniffed, wiped his tears away, and pulled away from Duo.
"I'm sorry, Heero, I didn't mean to keep him so long." Heero immediately sat down to comfort him. "What happened?" he asked Duo. Duo didn't know what to say, "uh...he's having guy problems." Heero quickly understood. "Oh." he said.
"Do you think you could sit here with him, there's something I need to do."
"I don't need a babysitter, Duo, I'm not baby, I can take care of myself, I'm fine." Quatre said angrily. Heero stood and helped Quatre get to his feet.
"You are too old for a babysitter Quatre... Let's just skip next period and go for a walk." Heero said. Duo smiled. "Yeah, that's a great idea, you don't wanna go to class in that condition do you." Duo agreed. Quatre really didn't wanna go to class.
"Well ok." Duo felt better." The bell's gonna ring in about five minutes. so you guys better get going." Duo was off to go find Trowa. He looked everywhere, but he was nowhere to be found. He was just about to give up when he saw him walk out of the bathroom. He went to him.
"Trowa, I need to talk to you."
"Now."
"Yes, now."
"Class is about to begin."
"I don't care, its important." Trowa sighed, "alright." Duo led him to a secluded area off campus. When they stopped Trowa spoke first.
"So what's this about?" Duo turned to face Trowa. He had a look on his face that Trowa had never seen before. A look of sheer disappointment.
"How could you do that to him Trowa, you know how fragile he is."
"Duo, it's none of your concern."
"It is my concern when my best friend is crying in my arms, telling me what an asshole you were to him.......if you had to turn him down Trowa , you could have AT LEAST been nice about it." Duo said screaming at him. Trowa turned his back to Duo and clenched his fist tightly. "He cried ...because of me." he said in a hurt, firm voice. Duo took a few stepped back. "Ohmygod!!!!!.........You do care about him.." Duo whispered in shock. Trowa stayed quiet, silently cursing himself for his actions towards Quatre.
"..I ..I don't understand..why would you.....how could you.....Trowa what the hell were you thinking?" Trowa turned to face Duo.
"You wouldn't understand, so can we please drop it?"
"NO... If you would have told me anything else besides you having feeling for him, maybe but-"
"I never said I had feelings for him." Trowa cut in. Duo jerked his head back in confusion. He thought for a minute.
"You're right, you didn't. But actions speak louder than words, Trowa. Can you honestly stand there and tell me that you're not in love with him?"
"Duo, you're making this harder than it has to be..." Trowa pleaded.
"Answer the question and I'll leave you alone." Duo said firmly. Trowa sighed and whispered. "Yes, I love him, and it kills me to know I've hurt him so badly." Duo smiled. "Well, then I suggest you do something about it then. Quatre's not the kind of person you wanna live without," and Duo left him to think about that. Trowa took a long walk, when he finally showed up it was just in time for dinner.
"It's about time you showed up, dinner's ready." Wufie snapped at him. Trowa ignored him and sat at the table. It was the first time Quatre had seen Trowa since that night. He wanted to retreat to his room, but he didn't wanna make a scene. Duo looked over at Trowa and smiled and ate his dinner. No one spoke through the whole dinner. The tension was very evident in the room. After dinner Trowa walked over to Quatre and politely asked if he could speak to him in private. Quatre hesitantly agreed and they walked out side.
"I wanted to apologize for my behavior the other night." Trowa said softly. Quatre took a deep breath.
"You know Trowa, you told me how you felt, and you're right, I need to let it go. There is no need to apologize. Good night." He left and went to his room. Trowa wanted to call after him, but something stopped him. Why is he making this so difficult? He started to go inside when Duo appeared out of no where.
"Try harder, you broke his heart, now you have to put it back together." Duo said as they walked into the house.
Moments later Duo was in Quatre's room.
"So, what happened?"
"He apologized."
"And"
"And.. and nothing I will not give myself to him. I need to make a clean break if I'm gonna get over it."
"Quatre, you should at least hear him out, this is not like you give him a chance."
"A chance for what Duo, to break it again?"
"I'm not sure Q, a chance for your friendship to continue at least. You said it yourself, you don't wanna lose him."
"You're right, I don't."
"Well, give him a chance." Duo walked to the door," I gotta go, Heero's waiting."
Duo walked into his room, and as always Heero was hacking away at his lap top. He didn't pay any attention to Duo's arrival. Duo had a big smile on his face. He laid on his bed, put his hands under his head, and crossed his legs.
"You should really stay out of their business." Heero finally said.
"I'm just trying to help out a friend. Quatre's done so much for me.. I just wanna do something for him."
".............Well, did it work," Duo's smile got bigger. "I think so." Heero closed his lap top. He walked over to Duo and sat next to him on the bed.
"Ai shiteru," he whispered in Duo's ear. Duo wrapped his arms around Heero and pulled him in close.
"What was that for?" Heero's lips brushed Duo's and he said. "Do I have to have a reason?" Before kissing him deeply, passionately.
Quatre walked out into the garden where he could hear Trowa playing his flute. Trowa didn't see Quatre coming. He walked up and sat next to Trowa. Trowa was very surprised to see him. He stopped playing and sat the flute down on his lap.
"That was beautiful." Quatre said. Trowa was actually nervous. He wasn't sure what he should say.
"Quare, I...uh.." He sighed. "Please Quatre I'm sorry for the way I treated, let me explain." Quatre took in a deep breath, preparing himself.
"Go on." Trowa shifted so that he could see Quatre's face.
"I never meant to hurt you, I would never intentionally hurt you, Quatre. I was going through a lot of things that night. I had a flash back of someone I killed a long time ago. He was just a kid, like 6 or 7. It was an accident. I was destroying a base, he got in the way." Trowa paused. A tear ran down his face due to the memory. Quatre so badly wanted to comfort him, but he just sat there and listened while Trowa continued. Trowa shook his head as if to shake the memory.
"I tried to save him, but it was too late." He whispered. Quatre put a hand out to comfort him. "Trowa."
"Quatre, Please let me finish."
"If you knew all the horrible things that I've done you wouldn't feel the same way. You deserve someone better. Someone who can offer you something more (I'm not talking about money), all I can offer is my love." Trowa put his head down to avoid eye contact with Quatre.
"How can you give yourself to me if that's all I have to offer?" Trowa finished. Quatre's face lit up, eyes sparkled. "Your love." Trowa looked up at him.
"Yes Quatre, my love. I've loved you since the moment I surrendered to you in our Gundams. I will always love you."
"Let me love you Trowa, I wanna be yours. I wanna give myself to you totally and completely. I don't care about what you did in the past. We've all done horrible things. We're Gundam pilots. It's expected.....not that it's right." Trowa felt like his heart might explode he was so happy to hear him say that.
"Are you sure this is what you want. I just want you to be happy, Quatre." Quatre moved to sit on Trowa's lap and he hugged him.
"I would be happiest with you." Trowa pulled Quatre closer to him, and they shared their first kiss. A sweet surrender.
The end....
So, please tell me, what did you think.