JC: HHHEEEEYYY!!! Happy Easter 2002!
Duo: Please… not a repeat of last year.
Treize: But just in case… I bought all the chocolate bunnies in the world!
JC: Uh… how much did THAT cost?
Treize: My credit matters are none of your business!
Heero: He spent UMPH! (Treize gags Heero)
Wufei: Disclaimer: JC doesn’t own Gundam Wing or any of its characters and never ever will.
JC: But I wish I did.
Treize: I won’t buy us for you.
JC: But I wish you did.
One year later… on the fateful day known as Easter, in which all went to hell the previous year, the day started off peacefully.
There was no war… for the moment anyway. And Quatre R. Winner was still in a deep slumber in his room. That is until… the alarm clock went off and a powerful rock and spicy beat shook the entire mansion.
“WWWWAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!” The blonde heir to the biggest fortune in the universe screamed and fell out of the bed. The alarm clock sported a little sign that said ‘It’s EASTER!’.
“WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAIIIII!!!” Another cry echoed through the house as Quatre dashed down the stairs and started searching everywhere for a chocolate bunny he could desecrate by stealing the ears.
Meanwhile, Heero and Duo were still lounging in bed.
“Ne, Heero? Didn’t something odd happen one year ago on this day?” Duo wondered sleepily.
“Hm? Oh… I think this was the day Quatre went insane and stole all the chocolate bunny ears.” Heero replied and smacked Duo on the head. “Now go back to sleep.”
Now that woke Duo up. The braided boy quickly jumped out of bed and dashed downstairs to find…
“AAAAHHH!!! THE EARS ARE GONE!”
Trowa Barton was awakened by a strange noise coming from the ‘living room’ of his trailer. The noises stopped instantly when he peered into the room. The room looked normal, his newest pet bunny was in the cage… but something was different about it… and then the chocolate bunny Catherine had bought looked a little funny. Upon further inspection…
“OH MY GOD! GET A VET! WE NEED TO REATTATCH SOME APPENDAGES!”
Dorothy Catalonia yawned and stretched. The day was joyous! The birds were singing, the sky was blue, her chocolate bunny sitting on her nightstand HAD SUDDENLY LOST IT’S EARS AND HAD ROACHES CRAWLING ALL OVER IT!
“AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!”
Lady Une checked out the security net again. The bunny was still safe inside the vault. Although Treize was dead, she vowed that this year NO ONE but her would lay hand on the chocolate bunny she had purchased. Finally, her boredom and hunger got the best of her. After deactivating fourteen different alarms, the vault lock was opened to find…
<THUD!>
Wufei unwrapped the top of his chocolate bunny. He smiled, for the bunny still had its ears. Quickly, he ate both of them… but then he noticed the bunny HAD NO FEET! Upon closer inspection, it appeared as if SOMEONE had eaten the ears and replaced them with the feet thinking he wouldn’t notice.
“SALLY?! DID YOU DO THIS?” He yelled.
“Do WHAT?” Sally walked in and saw the state of the bunny… and then quickly grabbed hers.
“QUATRE!” they both screamed.
Quatre was very happy. Full and happy. However, as he pranced back to the mansion with huge chocolate stains on his shirt, the ground suddenly began to shake as four very angry Gundam pilots accompanied by several very PO’ed women stomped across the grass.
“Uh… Hi everyone!” Quatre smiled.
“You… ate our bunny ears!” Heero accused.
“MY POOR BUNNY!” Trowa screamed, causing everyone to look at him strangely. “WHAT?!”
“Trowa… I think you should lie down a bit.” Duo suggested.
“NO! MY BUNNY! HOW COULD YOU QUATRE?!” Trowa cried, tears streaming down his face.
“But I don’t…” Quatre started but was interrupted when a large plastic pink bunny suddenly rose from the ground.
“I AM… THE ALL POWERFUL… EASTER BUNNY!!!” the bunny declared, its voice shaking the ground and causing birds to fall out of trees.
“The ‘all powerful Easter bunny’?” Noin repeated, not impressed.
“BLEAH!” Une and Heero stuck out their tongues in disgust.
“YOU, QUATRE RABERBA WINNER, HAVE DESECRATED CHOCOLATE BUNNIES INCESSANTLY!” the giant pink bunny screeched. “WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?!”
“I… I…” Quatre stammered. “I’m SO SORRY! EVERYONE, PLEASE FORGIVE MY TRANSGRESSION!”
“Apology accepted.” Trowa said.
“If you had just TOLD us you liked bunny ears, we would have given them to you, willingly.” Sally said gently before turning to Relena. “Make sure you get some kind of law for this. We don’t want anymore upset bunnies.”
“THEY MAY HAVE ACCEPTED YOUR APOLOGY, BUT I HAVEN’T!” the giant bunny laughed and stomped forward to attack Quatre.
“OH SHUT UP ALREADY!” Duo lost his temper and handed an equally upset Catherine his knife.
“I’ve heard enough!” Wufei drew his sword while Sally and Noin armed themselves with rocket launchers.
“FIRE!” Une ordered and knives, rockets, explosives, grenades, and other various sharp dangerous objects began showering the bunny.
“EEP! TAKE MY EASTER EGG BOMBS!” the pink horror fought back. But the brightly colored eggs were deflected right by Relena and her giant croquet mallet.
“FORE!” the ‘peace-promoting’ Vice-Minister screamed and whacked another egg back.
“EEEEEEEEEKKKKK!!!” the bunny screamed as rotten yolks showered it.
“EHEHEHEHEHEHEH…” Heero suddenly began to laugh as he held up a self-destruct remote. “DIE!”
BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZZZZZZZOOOOOOOOOOOOOBBBBBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!
In the end, the roaches that had once crawled over Dorothy’s chocolate bunny desecrated the huge pink bunny.
“I love a happy ending!” the blonde woman exclaimed. “Now the day is truly wondrous! OH JOY TO MY LIFE!”
Quatre was forgiven for his crimes and wound up in bed with a stomachache, and Trowa watching over him. Lady Une gave up guarding chocolate bunnies, because let’s just face it: it wasn’t profitable. Relena and Dorothy enjoyed the rest of their Easter in a small, seaside café, eating fresh fish and ham for dinner. Unfortunately, the media got wind of this and soon the once innocent dinner suddenly changed into a not-so-innocent sex scandal. Heero and Duo returned home to their apartment where Heero proved once again he couldn’t cook anything without throwing his ‘essence of Duo’ into the dish somewhere. Sally, Une, Catherine, and Noin dragged Wufei into town and right into a karaoke bar. Soon after that, the sounds of a drunk Wufei singing echoed through the night…
And so, Easter in the year AC 196 came to a close… with new life, came new… hobbies, for Wufei was forever hooked on karaoke.
JC: Well, that’s about it! Happy Easter minna-san!
Heero: That was horrible!
Duo: … Hee-chan, you are a terrible cook.
JC: Right, well, see ya later! Hope you had a fun Sunday! (goes to eat a ham sandwich) AAARRRRGGGGHHH!! WE ARE GONNA BE EATING THIS FOR A WHILE!