"And here's my lovely, domestic housewife of a husband!"
Heero dropped the newspaper and the plastic grocery bags onto the table next to the doorway, shooting a wink in Duo's general direction when the boy turned around to scowl. Said scowling beauty pulled his plastic glove-covered hands out of the soapy water and wiped his hands off on the apron wrapped snuggly around his waist. Still dressed in his pajama bottoms and kitty-cat slippers, Duo was probably the most adorable thing to come home to... ever.
"How will you feel when your 'domestic housewife of a husband' stabs you when you sleep?"
Heero took a step towards Duo and gave him a quick kiss before heading back to the grocery bags. Reaching into one of them, he grabbed some of the crap (because that's all it really was) he bought and started to unload it into their respective cabinets. Duo watched him closely for a little too long before going to lend a helping hand. They worked around each other for a couple of long minutes before all the groceries were packed and put up, the milk in the fridge, the cereal on the counter, the cookies in Duo's hands. Heero placed a 12-pack of soda in the cabinet and pulled one out for himself, fiddling with the tab for a while until he realized he couldn't open it with his short nails.
Duo nibbled on a cookie, stretching out one hand to look at his own nails. So he only had a couple of good ones, so what. When it came down to it, he had more nail than Heero did on all his fingers put together. His Japanese lover eyed him from across the kitchen, cradling his soda to his chest and nearly drooling when he stared at the outstretched hand. Grinning when he noticed Heero's hell bent look, Duo dropped his hand and ate another cookie.
Putting on his cutest look, Heero shuffled across the kitchen to stand in front of Duo. His eyes tracked the journey of a bunch of cookie crumbs as it broke free from the actual cookie source and fell to the tile. Duo's blue-violet eyes lit up in disappointment as they noticed (like Heero did) that some of it got away. Instantly blaming Heero for walking over and changing the general atmosphere of the space around him, Duo pointed at the crumbs and pouted.
"My cookie."
"Those are crumbs, love."
Heero held out the soda can, joining in on the pouting game. Duo's pout washed away and he ignored the can, crouching down to clean up the crumbs. He knew not to leave food on the floor anymore after he had woken up one day, gone to the kitchen, and found ants trying to take away their damn table.
Brushing the crumbs into one hand, the box of intact food circles under his arm, Duo stood up and pushed aside the idea of throwing the crumbs at his pouting husband. Instead, he went and dumped them in the garbage bag, turning and smiling at Heero again once the ordeal was over.
"Saaaay, Duo?"
"Yeeeeees, Heero?"
"Can you open this for me?"
"Can't do, babe. Sorry."
"I... bought you cookies."
"I... put cookies on the grocery list."
"Exactly. You only put 'cookies'. I bought your favorite."
Duo shook his head, dismissing his lover.
Heero was there in a second, both of his hands gripping onto the front of Duo's apron. With one rough tug, Duo was in his arms and fighting him like a minx. To make a long story short, they both eventually ended up on the floor, Heero's hand wrapped around Duo's wrist... Duo's cookies halfway across the room... Heero's soda still cradled to his damn chest.
"Get off me, you weirdo!"
Heero winked down at Duo, shaking his head.
"Heero-san, off!"
"Can't do that, hubby."
Duo opened his mouth to continue to complain but was firmly stopped when Heero dropped down and gave him a little kiss. The American stopped his lover before he could actually pull away, and brought Heero back down for a mutual kiss. Things started to get a little hot and bothered, hands were roaming, and the mood was suddenly ruined as a loud crack sounded in the kitchen.
"Heero?"
"Yes, Duo-kun?"
"Heero, did you just-"
"Yes I did, Duo-kun."
"So, you're telling me that you-"
"Indeed I did, Duo-kun."
"Ok. Just making sure."
Duo playfully started to smack Heero in any available place he could reach.
"I am not a fucking can opener, you jerk!"
Heero sat back, dropping Duo's hand and bringing his soda up to his lips for a small sip.
"You wouldn't open my can."
Duo slithered out from under his husband, climbing to his feet with a flood of colorful cuss words. Pointing an accusing finger at Heero (no doubt the one Heero used to open the can), he mumbled out incoherent threats and stalked towards the doorway.
"I'm cutting my damn nails, you ass."
Halfway down the hallway, Duo laughed the second Heero's calm voice reached his ears.
"Have fuuuun!"